I didn't teach. And I think I wish I had. Having come quite close to strike in my first years of teaching, it was hard to suspend my criticism of the plan for a system-wide walkout today, the first day of classes for 8 of the 10 campuses. It seemed that there weren't enough steps...a walkout should be a last resort. I keep thinking of the students who are new to UC Davis. My 11:00 might have been the first college class for some of them. I hope I can make it up to any of them who feel cheated, ignored, denied.
I chose not to teach today because I wanted to support staff and faculty who had decided to walk out. Even as I was deciding, I felt that I didn't have a choice, but I knew I'd show solidarity because I love my professors. It felt morally right, even as it felt nothing like social justice. It felt morally right, even though I didn't think a walkout on the first day of classes would serve a purpose. And it's too early for something like that.
But since so many, especially faculty, had decided to take such a drastic measure, I felt I had to take it seriously and act according to what I'd been taught and experienced re: labor strife...like nurses and doctors do when a patient comes to the emergency room, but isn't really in a state of emergency. It's like I took some sort of oath.
I came to campus and left my keys to Sproul in the car so I wouldn't be tempted to cross any picket lines, even to use the bathroom. But I didn't see any. In fact, there weren't many people at the rally at all. The people I'd wanted to support didn't appear to need it, and after all that, so many classes did meet. But a lot of TAs didn't teach. Or come to campus. When people asked me why I was driving all the way to Davis since I wasn't teaching, I just said that I wanted to support staff and faculty. I was afraid of sounding smug or something, so I left off the part about how I take work kind of seriously and if I wasn't going to show up to teach today that my absence could only be justified by my attending the rally, at the very least.
Within 5-10 minutes of the speeches, I became disheartened. The crowd was so sparse. The main issues weren't broached until quite late. There were some impassioned speeches, some inappropriate, extra-topical speeches, and some just plain lame speeches. But it was the lack of attendees that was the most discouraging. I greeted only one professor, but was too shy to talk to him, as he'd recently agreed to substitute on my oral exam next week. I saw my advisor from a distance. He may have seen me, but he left the scene pretty quickly. They were the only two from my department that I saw. I only saw 6 other Spanish TAs. And that's fine...I will never alter my opinions of my colleagues based on their choices today. But such poor attendence perhaps reflects that most people were smarter than I and realized that this event was not going to be effective and their time would be better spend doing what teachers and students were supposed to do - go to class. So why did I take it so seriously? It's my own fault, I suppose, I didn't talk to any professors or many other TAs about their plans for the day...
Perhaps things were different on other UC campuses. And I know that some grad (from other departments) were heartened by what they saw. I couldn't help but feel quite the opposite. But perhaps I'm cynical and negative.
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