I should have known by now.

A list of just some of the things it took me way too long to learn:

1. That's Mick Jagger singing back up on Carly Simon's "You're so vain"!

2. You can and should always keep a good tweezers in your wallet. My sisters descended of hearty Eastern European or Mediterranean peasant stock know exactly what I'm talking about.

3. We don't have to dial a "1" before the area code on our cell phones.

4. The difference between Meg Ryan and Melanie Griffith - Griffith is the one you'd want backing you up in a fight.

5. What steampunk is.

6. "It only takes a minute, girl, to fall in love." En serio.

7. RSVPing and mailing things don't take very long either.

8. Spend on shoes, save on everything else.

9. Douchebaggery transcends age, race, gender, class, ethnicity, nationality and economic ability.

10. Palm Springs' art museum kicks modern art ass!

11. Everything looks, smells, sounds, tastes and feels better with love.